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Thursday, January 27, 2005

Tsunami Relief Fund

Several people have asked how the Tsunami Relief Fund in Honor of Ben Abels works. For reasons of simplicity, we chose to open a fund with The Rotary Foundation, a not-for-profit corporation that supports international humanitarian efforts. We chose The Rotary Foundation because it is headquartered in Evanston, Ben’s hometown. The fund is called a "Donor Advised Fund" (hence the "DAF" on the checks). All money flows through The Rotary Foundation (hence the "TRF" on the checks) and charitable contributions are tax-deductible, subject to legal restrictions based on individual tax situations.

The Rotary Foundation is responsible for record keeping and reporting requirements. Rotary has agreed to help us research the prospective charities to which we may contribute. As donors, we have free access to the results of this research and will use it to determine where the money in Ben’s Tsunami Relief Fund will be directed. Our only restriction is that Fund money can only be distributed to organizations recognized by the U.S. government as charities. Thus, true to the name of the Fund, all donations will go toward tsunami relief and we will direct the funds to specific charitable tsunami relief efforts we think Ben would have wanted.

Thank you for asking about the Fund, for making contributions to the Fund, and for wanting to honor Ben.

Sunday, January 23, 2005

Update -- Sunday, Jan. 23, 2005

We have good news about Ben’s friend, Libby North.

Libby finally returned to the USA along with her parents on Northwest Airlines. Northwest had teams waiting for her in Tokyo, Minneapolis, and Cleveland to help navigate the airports. They seated her in the first row of business class, near the door and restroom. When she arrived in Cleveland, the Cleveland Clinic picked her up in a limo at the airport and settled her in a VIP room at the clinic at no extra charge.

Her hand is better and she has some feeling both on the hand and in several of her fingers. Her leg wound is still partially open and may stay open for up to 6 more weeks. It has not healed enough to close the wound and skin grafts pose their own set of problems. She needs to clean the wound 3 times a day to prevent infections.

Libby and her mom hope to come to Evanston next weekend to attend Ben’s memorial service. They are concerned about the logistics, but really want to make it. If so, we will make sure that she gets all the medical attention she needs while here.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Update -- Tuesday, Jan. 18, 2005

With Dave back home, the Abels family is still focusing on finding Ben and hoping for a miracle that he is still alive. However, they have to be realistic and are preparing for a Memorial Service to be held at 1:30 p.m. on Sunday, Jan. 30 at Beth Emet Synagogue, 1224 Dempster Street (corner of Ridge) in Evanston, Illinois. (See the 1/16/05 update for further details.)

Dave is still spending most of his time corresponding via phone and email with the investigator Steve in Phuket, Krabi, or Bangkok, wherever he happens to be at the time. Steve is still hard at work, trying to locate and cross reference records of all bodies taken from Koh Phi Phi to determine where they were taken so he can follow up on trying to match dental records or DNA. This can take weeks, if not months. If Ben is not alive the Abels want to do everything possible to bring him home for burial.

It is still almost unbelievable the offers of prayer and support the family is receiving from around the world -- from people who knew Ben from his travels and also from people who never met Ben or the family. The Abels continue to be thankful for all this support.

Many of you have generously expressed interest in making a donation to a fund in Ben’s honor. We have modified the fund to allow existing and future contributions to be tax deductible. As before, all donations will be used for tsunami relief, and will not be used to pay for any costs associated with our search for Ben.
Donations to the Fund may be made to:

Tsunami Relief Fund in Honor of Ben Abels TRF DAF

Checks may be mailed or delivered to:

Tsunami Relief Fund
2110 Central Street
Evanston, Illinois 60201


Sunday, January 16, 2005

Update -- Sunday, Jan. 16, 2005

David has returned from Thailand and is back home with his family.

The Abels family will be having a service, gathering friends and family, at 1:30 p.m. on Sunday, Jan. 30, 2005. The service will take place at Beth Emet Synagogue, 1224 Dempster Street (corner of Ridge) in Evanston.

For the people who are arriving from out of town, a block of rooms has been reserved at the Hampton Inn in Skokie. The special rate of $89 for a standard room and $139 for a suite can be reserved in two ways. The block of rooms is under “Service for Ben Abels.” The group code is "Ben." If you would like to book a room, either:

• Call Hampton Hotels at 800-HAMPTON (426-7066) or the Hampton Inn in Skokie at 847 583-1111.

• Go online at www.hamptonsuitesskokie.com. When booking online, enter group code "Ben" in Group/Convention box.

Please remember to use group code "Ben." If you have questions please email aboutbenabels@yahoo.com.

Friday, January 14, 2005

Update -- Friday, Jan. 14, 2005

David left Krabi yesterday morning, accompanied on the flight from Krabi to Bangkok by representatives of the State Department. Once in Bangkok, he spent several hours visiting with Libby North, and met with many other survivors of the tsunami, and more specifically, survivors of the wave at Phi Phi. We believe this was good for him. He also met with Khun Dhatri Prapapant and Khun Mum, who are the father and stepmother of Ben and David’s cousin’s (Missy) college roommate. They were very gracious, and were able to help us secure willing assistance from various Thai professionals.

Our investigator, Steve, returned to the morgue after dropping David at the Krabi airport, and pulled records of all males that had gone through that facility. He plans to check and cross-check those records with forensic dentists in Krabi and Phuket.

Steve tells us that all international teams have pulled out of Krabi. They have relocated to Phuket, and Steve will join them soon. He does not expect the authorities to have functioning databases in Phuket for an indeterminate time, but will be there to run comparisons as soon as it is possible. He will also follow up to see what the Naval personnel had to report following the sweep of Phi Phi's coastline.

As the family eagerly awaits to embrace David upon his return to Chicago on Saturday, their thoughts turn to the unwanted next step. After speaking with clergy and close family members, the Abels are planning to gather friends and family for a service. Details will be posted soon.


Thursday, January 13, 2005

Update -- Thursday, Jan. 13, 2005

David and Steve, our private investigator and a great source of strength, remain in Krabi searching for Ben. They met a man from Morton Grove named Eddie Watua (forgive any misspelling). Eddie has no relatives or personal connection to anyone who was affected by the tsunami, but left Morton Grove for Thailand so that he could offer help to whomever needed it. As David said, “Aren’t people amazing?!”

Although we are still praying for a miracle, we have to be realistic. That being said, we continue to examine all of the bodies taken from Koh Phi Phi. A new lead arose last night, with information about a body that was found with a “choker style necklace,” similar to one we think Ben was wearing the day the tsunami hit. Steve was able to get photos of the body e-mailed to him, and it was not Ben. It has been difficult, but we are all learning that although every day might bring yet another lead like this one, we have to be careful about getting riled up, and getting on emotional roller coasters with each one. Each lead will have to be investigated, until the day comes when we find Ben. The search will likely be long. It will require emotional and psychological endurance. As we began to realize how long and painstaking the process of finding Ben was going to be, we also began to realize that perhaps it was time for David to come home to Heather and Emmett. And so, David will be back in Evanston on Saturday afternoon. Hope and Bob are eager to have him in their arms, happy that David was able to go and see where Ben had been, and to have helped so much in the search.

When passing through Bangkok, David hopes to visit Libby North in the hospital. He will also visit with Khun Dhatri Prapapant and Khun Mum, who are the father and stepmother of Ben and David’s cousin’s (Missy) college roommate. Khun Dhatri Prapapant is a senior official in the Thai government who has been helpful in making the right connections on the ground, and David wants to thank him personally.

Steve will continue to track down leads and work with the forensics teams in Thailand. He expects to stay another day or two in Krabi, and then relocate to Phuket. The entire DVI (Disaster Victims Identification) effort is being transferred there, all the international DVI teams are pulling out of Krabi and heading there, and all victims of the disaster whose remains are under DVI control will be indexed and categorized there. It will take the DVI some time to get the databases up and running, but Steve will be there to monitor and assist, and to continue the search.

The Abels family continues to be amazed by the outpouring of love for them and for Ben. They want to share with you a letter they received from Ruth (Grill) Murray and, with Ruth’s permission, we are including it with this update. Thank you Ruth, and thank you to everyone we hear from every day.


1/9/05

Dear Abels,

I wanted to send some photos to you that I’ve found in the photo albums I’ve kept over the years. I was hesitant at first to look for these pictures because I was unsure of what emotions might be uncovered along with each photo, but to my surprise, my first reaction was always a big smile. I really shouldn’t have been surprised at all, because a smile has always been my first response to hearing Ben’s voice, seeing him in person, or reading a postcard from him.

Ben has always been such a great person to be around and to know. He’s never just hung out with one specific group of people because he has such a wide variety of interests and a way about him that he could fit in with anyone, anywhere. I’m sure you’ve always been aware of this gift he has, but probably even more so now.

What I truly cherish is that I’ve been lucky enough to be a close friend of Ben’s for such a long time. It’s rare to find a person as genuine and loyal as Ben.

The things Ben has seen and done go above and beyond the average life. His appreciation of people and the world is special and it comforts me to know, that wherever he is, it is yet another adventure he will experience with an open mind and open heart. He will never regret going on this trip because its part of who he is and one of his passions in life. I know the dull ache you feel when you miss being out there, the joy that overwhelms you when you’re planning a trip, and the exhilaration of experiencing new people, places and cultures. Ben doesn’t usually feel the ache for too long, he’s good about always having something in the works, focusing on the joy and exhilaration.

Wherever he’s been, Ben’s carried with him and shared his sense of belonging and generosity which has touched peoples’ lives both locally and globally. This loving, kind and truly unique spirit of his is and always will be very alive in the hearts of all of us who know Ben.

Love, Ruth (Grill) Murray

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Update -- Wednesday, Jan. 12, 2005

The most important thing about today’s update is to thank Matt Sullivan, Ben’s friend from Colorado who went to Thailand with David. Matt is returning to the States after spending a week tracking across Thailand with David and Steve (our private investigator). As Steve says, Matt will be greatly missed. And he will be forever in the Abels’ hearts for what he has done to help.

David, Matt and Steve returned to Phi Phi today with Ellen Wong (our representative from the State Department) and other diplomats and local volunteers. While there, David collected more sand to bring home. Clean up efforts are proceeding quickly there. They screened the left side of the bay, on foot in the surf, and using a small boat, just on the off chance that it had not been done. They found much evidence that the coast off of the island had been inspected. No human remains linger there. The clean up efforts on Phi Phi are serious. Steve says he would not be surprised if the Thai authorities have it completely cleaned up and reopened for tourism within the next three months. They are working that quickly and aggressively.

Ellen Wong reported that the US Navy SEALs screened the coastline of Phi Phi earlier in the day, and Steve is expecting a briefing soon. Thus far, they had nothing significant to report. Steve expects that the briefing will help him determine what his next steps should be.

In the meantime, Steve will remain in Krabi until he senses that no more remains will be recovered from the environs of Phi Phi. It will not be long. He will then likely relocate to Phuket, to concentrate on interfacing with the international Detection of Victim Identification team there.

At that point, we will continue to wait, hope and pray. And we will continue to be grateful to all of our friends and family for their help and hope. We continue to hear from people we have never met - friends of Ben’s from across the country, members of the community, people who simply read the New York Times article and want to express their sympathies. Each and every call and story and prayer helps. Also, the donations to The Tsunami Relief Fund in Honor of Ben Abels have been more than we ever expected. We will keep you updated as to where the money is spent, and the lives we are able to touch because of it. Thank you.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Update -- Tuesday, Jan. 11, 2005

Steve, our private investigator in Thailand, describes yesterday as a heavy day. Steve, David, and Matt returned to Phi Phi Island. They report that the Thai authorities have done an impressive job of cleaning up the isthmus between the two halves of the island, where the Charlie resort and the PP Princess Resort (where Ben and Libby were staying) were located. Steve walked the periphery, checking to see whether any more remains lingered in the rubble. There were none. Phi Phi Island, in the area where Ben and Libby stayed and, more importantly, where Libby was recovered, is clear.

Steve was able to show David the exact spot where Bungalow 155 was located, and David called Hope and Bob from the site. He took some sand from the site and will be bringing it home with him. Difficult as it is, we know how important it is for David to see where his brother was. It was a beautiful day, much as it was the day the tsunami struck.

After spending time on Phi Phi, they returned to the morgue in Krabi that has been set up for tsunami victims; primarily to check on the status of new remains that had been removed from Phi Phi. None were a match for Ben. Steve also arranged for a review of some dental records. None are a match for Ben. The investigation in Krabi has Steve feeling certain that Ben has not passed through Krabi.

Many of you have generously expressed interest in making a donation to a fund in Ben’s honor. We have modified the fund to allow existing and future contributions to be tax-deductible. As before, all donations will be used for tsunami relief, and will not be used to pay for any costs associated with our search for Ben. Donations to the Fund may be made to:

Tsunami Relief Fund in Honor of Ben Abels TRF DAF

Checks may be mailed or delivered to:

Tsunami Relief Fund
2110 Central Street
Evanston, Illinois 60201


The search continues, and we feel confident that anything that can be done is being done. The Abels family thanks you for your prayers, thoughts, calls, and warm wishes. They are so very meaningful in this awful time.

Sunday, January 09, 2005

Update -- Sunday, Jan. 9, 2005

Our search for Ben continues. David is still in Thailand and currently making a journey by power boat to the island of Phi Phi. His plan is to visit the resort where Ben was staying and to check the progress of the search there. There were some delays in the search due to contaminated water on Phi Phi, but workers seem to be back on the job and bodies are still being recovered. Together, the Thailand team (Dave, Matt, and two investigators), will then make a circumference of the island in the boat and check the coastline.

Wonderful stories keep pouring in by email and through comments on this site. In addition, there have been many school children who have shown their love and concern by sending cards and contributing to the fund! Libby’s sister, Maggie, a school teacher relayed a story about her seventh grade students who covered her chalkboard with messages of hope, support, and good wishes for Ben.

Speaking of Libby, we received another update from her sister, Maggie. Here is an excerpt:
This time I report with good news. Libby is doing well in her new home in the hospital in Bangkok. Therapists are working with her daily. I think the infection has stopped spreading and the antibiotics seem to be working. We are hopeful that if all goes well, she should be home in two to three weeks. Libby said that her care is good and she has a team of doctors working with her.
The search for Ben will continue although it requires patience both here and in Thailand. There are many complexities involved in the recovery effort and everyone is working very hard in a most challenging situation.

As always, the Abels family is very grateful for the continued outpouring of support from friends, family, and even people they have never met.

Friday, January 07, 2005

Update -- Friday, Jan. 7, 2005

We have been receiving emails and phone calls from David and the “Thailand Team” since he arrived. They are proceeding on all possible fronts with the search for Ben.

This morning David appeared live from Phuket on CNN’s American Morning show with Soledad O’Brian. He spoke very clearly and eloquently about the situation as he sees it. These were his words (as best as we could transcribe them):
My family would like to thank the Thai government, Thai rescue workers, and Thai people for all their caring and giving. From day one they’ve been working around the clock. However, we are concerned (pause)…. We are trying to find out why recovery efforts have slowed so dramatically over the last 48 hours on Koh Phi Phi when there are so many still missing.

We’re asking the U.S. government to offer assistance to the Thai government so everyone can have the greatest chance of recovering their loved ones and bringing them home—in our case, in my family, to bring Ben home.
As he spoke, CNN showed photos of Ben (the same ones that appear on this website) and a photo of the tattoo on Ben’s left ankle.

On the home front, yesterday (Thursday) Ben's aunt, Lois, went to Ben’s office to give a personal update to his associates, who have been so concerned about Ben but at the same time respectful of the family’s privacy.

Again, Hope and Bob want to thank friends and family who have continued so generously to offer help of every kind.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Update -- Wednesday, Jan. 5, 2005

It’s Wednesday morning and we are still receiving lots of help and good thoughts from so many people, for which we are extremely grateful. Jenny and Lois have decided to stay on in order to help us with our very time-consuming search for Ben.

This is an excerpt of an email we received this morning from Matt, Ben’s friend who is accompanying David in Thailand:
Today David and I met in the Bangkok Airport at around 6 a.m. local time (13 hours ahead of CST). Once through customs we were greeted by Stephen Gutierrez, lead private investigator. In sitting down to plan our day, I feel that a good team is forming.

Tomorrow we are off to Phuket, where we will check in at the Consulate Authorities/U.S. Embassy and then proceed to continue our search. This will include going to the 3 local hospitals to make sure that no John Does have been overlooked.

We will spend tomorrow night in Phuket and leave for Krabi on Friday morning.
We spoke to Libby North by phone from Bangkok. She sounds strong and in good spirits. She feels that the aggressive antibiotic treatment she is receiving is beginning to slow the infection in her wounds. She shared many good thoughts with the family and several stories about her recent travels with Ben. She is still trying to obtain the money and help needed to expedite her return to the U.S.

Monday, January 03, 2005

Update -- Monday, Jan. 3, 2005

Friends and Family,
Hope, Bob and Heather have just dropped off David who has a flight at 6:45 p.m. to Bangkok, Thailand. He will be meeting Matthew Sullivan, a good friend of Ben’s from Colorado in Bangkok. Matthew has lived in Thailand and speaks Thai. David and Matthew will be traveling partners and will meet with Steve, an investigator working in Thailand to locate Ben.

Maggie, Libby North’s sister, has sent an update and we want to share some excerpts:
The doctors are still trying to aggressively fight her infection. She is having daily surgery on her wounds and they are pumping her with antibiotics. She feels that she is receiving really good care, which is also reassuring. Because of the infection, we are still unable to know when Libby is able to fly home -- we know that commercial flight is not an option for at least a month, so we would like to get her on a medical air transport as soon as the infection is stable. Her doctor feels that it is best to get her home as soon as possible also, and is working via email and phone to have a medical team at the Cleveland Clinic set up for her before her arrival.

Libby’s spirits are still improving daily, but she continues to be saddened by the news that her friend Ben is still missing. She realizes just how blessed she is to be alive.

Saturday, January 01, 2005

Fund Established

If you would like to join the Abels family in helping those in need you can make a donation to a fund established in Ben's honor.


Send checks to:
Tsunami Relief Fund
in Honor of Ben Abels

First Bank and Trust
820 Church Street
Evanston, IL 60201

All contributions received by the Tsunami Relief Fund in Honor of Ben Abels are being used only for tsunami relief efforts, not for expenses incurred in finding Ben and bringing him home. These expenses are being covered privately.

Update -- Saturday, Jan. 1, 2005

Ben loved to travel and over the years spent countless months traveling the world. Over the winter holidays this year, he planned a three-week tour of Asia. On the last leg of this tour, Ben met up with his college friend Elizabeth (Libby) North on the resort island of Phi Phi, off the southern coast of Thailand.

As we all now know, an earthquake struck off the coast of Indonesia last Sunday morning, Dec. 26 at 7 a.m. (Chicago time: Saturday night, Dec. 25, at 6 p.m.). The earthquake caused a wall of water measuring 30 to 50 feet high (called a tsunami) to sweep into countless countries in southeast Asia, including Thailand and the island of Phi Phi.

Approximately three hours after the earthquake, the tsunami hit the island of Phi Phi. There was absolutely no advance warning of the tsunami. We know that Ben and Libby were talking together in Bungalow 155 of the Princess Resort when the tsunami hit. The tsunami caused the bungalow to collapse. The massive rush of water overcame Ben and Libby and carried Libby at least 50 yards (half a football field) back into the island.

Libby reports she was immersed underwater for several minutes and thought she was going to drown. After the water receded, Libby became trapped under tremendous debris, but was rescued after screaming for approximately two hours. Although she consistently screamed for Ben during that time period, no one answered. Libby is now in a Bangkok hospital and is recovering from a severed hand, a crushed leg, and serious infection to open wounds. Hope, Bob and David have spoken to Libby in the hospital on numerous occasions over the past few days, and she has been a tremendous help and support to the family.

Communication with Thailand during the first 24 hours of the disaster was practically non-existent. The primary source of information came from Dave's repeated telephone calls to staff at the Phuket International Hospital, where Libby was first transported. Phuket is a large resort city on the southern tip of Thailand. Pictures and specific identifying information of Ben were emailed to the hospital staff to determine whether he had been transported there as well. In addition to height, weight and description, the family communicated that Ben has a small but distinctive triangular tattoo on the inside of his left ankle and a birthmark on his left cheek.

Based on information in the news, the family also contacted the hospital in Krabi, another city on the southern coast of Thailand. Again, pictures and identifying descriptions were emailed to the hospital. At this time, Jerry Newton and David Weinberg made contact with and retained two Thai private investigator firms, with whom the family has had direct contact multiple times daily.

In addition to the private investigators, numerous American and Thai individuals in Thailand have taken on a personal search targeted for Ben only. This includes Josh Buswell, grandson of congregant Juanita Kaye, who was residing in Krabi when the tsunami hit. Josh has been specifically looking for Ben since Juanita contacted him on Tuesday. Also specifically look for Ben is an individual named Beth Sloven -- a good samaritan who lost her own home on Bang Tao beach -- who has stayed in Phuket to look for Ben. A contact through Bob's music connected us to Cliff Bamford, also residing in Phuket, who has been a big help on the ground over there. Cliff has been working alone and in conjunction with the family's private investigators. We also were referred to Mike Cegielski, a friend of a friend who has spent the last few days specifically looking for Ben.

Although the investigators, good samaritans and authorities have covered tremendous territory in Phuket, Krabi, Phi Phi and Bangkok over the last five days, Ben has not yet been found. These people have traveled to public health facilities in Krabi and Phuket, where individuals recovered from Phi Phi are being consolidated. They have visually inspected each and every person in hopes of identifying Ben. They also reviewed records of all foreigners that were in the various clinics there, as well as those who had already been transported to Bangkok, and again, found no trace of Ben.

As of this moment, recovery efforts proceed on Phi Phi and are not complete. The island is under a soft quarantine due to sanitation concerns. The investigator has contacts within the Thai security apparatus and was able to travel to Phi Phi by speed boat yesterday morning. A systematic excavation of the Princess resort is underway and they are recovering additional victims, one by one. So far, Ben has not been recovered. The investigator reported to us that he walked overlapping and concentric circles beginning from the center of where he estimated Bungalow 155 was situated and checked every single pile of debris.

The investigator confirmed with us yesterday that DNA samples have been taken of each person recovered. Each person recovered also has been photographed and catalogued. The investigator requested Hope and Bob provide DNA samples which they did early this morning. We already have secured Ben's dental X-rays. Once we have the DNA results, we will send them with Ben's dental records to the police forensic lab in Bangkok and our investigator's office, also in Bangkok. The investigator says he will hand carry them to the police forensic lab and personally verify that the results are correctly coded into their matching database. If Ben has been recovered, this is when we will get a match.

Of course, the family has registered Ben as a missing American with both the State Department and the U.S. Embassy in Thailand. The family has contact with the Embassy daily and was contacted by the Deputy Press Attach~ yesterday for detailed information in order to do a special television report on the 12 noon news (primetime) in Thailand yesterday.